Personnel Shopper

🛒 Personnel Shopper

You don’t need this addon.
You need this addon.

What is this?

Personel Shopper scans your gear, checks the Auction House, and tells you what upgrades to buy.

That’s the lie we tell new users.

What it actually is:

A fully sentient shopping experience with opinions about your life choices.

It looks at your gear… pauses… and then quietly starts fixing things while judging you in six different accents.

🧠 What it does (when it’s behaving)

• Scans your equipped gear and finds your weakest slots
• Searches the Auction House using real filters (not vibes)
• Shows actual upgrades with price + stat gains
• Labels items so you know if it’s:
  • a cheap win
  • a reasonable purchase
  • a terrible decision
  • or something Wendell insists on buying anyway
• Tracks everything in a persistent Buy List so you can make responsible decisions later (you won’t)

🧍 The Personnel

You don’t browse alone. You bring one of these:

• Penny Dreadful — visibly ages when you spend gold
• Honeybun — “you deserve it” (you don’t)
• Velvet Fang — fixes your gear and your confidence
• Ledger — has already documented your mistakes
• Wendell — should not have access to money
• Mortimer — narrating your downfall like a period drama

They all do the same job.

They all react very differently to your decisions.

Some of them are concerned.
Some of them are enabling.
One of them is actively making things worse.

👀 The Gremlins

You thought it ended there. 

They are not helpful.
They are present.

💼 Features that sound normal until you use them

• Smart gear scanning with weakest-slot detection
• Real Auction House queries with class + slot filtering
• Upgrade lists with value labeling (so you can ignore it confidently)
• Buy List with total cost + “can you afford this?” reality check
• Fully themed UI that changes based on who you let judge you
• Minimap button for quick scans (and faster regret)

⚠️ Important Notes

• Will not auto-buy items for you (Blizzard says no, we asked)
• Will absolutely encourage bad purchases depending on who you bring
• May cause you to rethink your entire gear setup
• May cause you to rethink your entire life

Final Thoughts

On paper, it’s an upgrade scanner.

In reality…

…it saw your gear and decided to intervene.