Biquette Mage Portal

Biquette Mage Portal

Stand in a capital. Open shop. Let the goat handle the rest.

You're a mage. Half your playtime is people yelling "WTB PORT" while you frantically type "destination?" forty times an hour, miss half of them, and watch a rival mage snatch the rest. This addon turns your portal business into a machine: it catches the customers, invites them, hands them the right portal, pockets the tip, and thanks them with a line tuned to how generous they felt. You barely touch your keyboard.

Built and obsessively tuned for one goal: catch the maximum number of real portal requests, and never embarrass you with a false one.

Catch every customer, ignore every time-waster

This is where Biquette Mage Portal shines. Most portal addons either miss half the customers or invite the whole city by mistake. This one was rebuilt to do neither.

• Three-layer detection. It reads channels, whispers and yells. First it checks common phrases for speed, then it breaks a message down into Intent ("I want"), Service ("a portal") and Destination ("Shattrath"), and reasons about each part. No destination given? It asks for one automatically in its first reply.
• Catches the lazy phrasings too. "LF shat", "portal og", "tp IF please"... the loose, half-typed requests that other addons ignore. If someone wants a portal, the goat finds them, even when they barely spell it out. More customers, fewer missed sales.
• An intent-scoring engine that filters the noise. Every message is scored, not just keyword-matched. Rival mages advertising "selling portals", enchanters spamming "LF Mongoose in IF", groups shouting "LFM heal for SM", crafters listing twenty stats... all scored out and ignored. It only bites on a genuine portal request, so you stop inviting people who never wanted you. Every weight is configurable if you want to fine-tune it.
• Anti-seller filter. Other mages announcing their own shop are recognised as competitors, not customers, and never invited.

A client tracker that's actually cool to look at

• The GOAT ORDERS ticket. Each customer gets a clean ticket showing their name, destination and live distance to you, with the correct interactive portal icon matching their request. Click the icon to read their original message. Hit one button to clear them once done. Returning regulars are tagged VIP right on the ticket.
• A full stats dashboard. Total gold, gold earned today, number of trades, average tip, your busiest hours of the day with the peak hour highlighted, your top clients, flagged scammers and your current stock, all in one styled window. Watch your gold-per-hour climb.

Reactions that make people laugh

Every tip triggers a thank-you message, picked at random from six lines per tier so it never sounds robotic and your regulars never see the same line twice.

• Tip 10g and you're crowned an absolute legend.
• Tip a generous 5g and the goat sings your praises.
• Tip 1g? You'll receive one of six flavours of heartfelt, gloriously passive-aggressive gratitude. Never rude, always polite, devastatingly sincere. Players have told me it's the funniest part of the addon.

Near-full automation

The portal goes out, tips are accepted automatically through trade, and removing a finished customer is a single click. The addon never shuts itself down behind your back: it stays open and working until you say otherwise. Everything else is handled.

Make it yours

• Add your own Intent / Destination / Service keywords to widen what the addon matches.
• Set an invite cooldown to any duration, or switch it off entirely.
• Adjust your food and water prices, with automatic low-stock alerts.
• Tweak the intent-scoring weights to match exactly who you want to catch.
• Edit the messages sent at each step.

Good to know

Right-click the addon icon in game to open the settings.

• Hid the icon by accident? Type /bmp show
• Other commands: /bmp, /bmp stats, /bmp help

Plant yourself in the nearest capital, open shop, and let the biquette do the talking.